The Wizard’s Apprentice

The Wizard’s Apprentice

The wizard’s apprentice was working, as his master often made him, on gathering herbs and cooking meals and whatever else he bade him. So much was the apprentice’s labor that he seldom had time for sleep. while his master slept in a nice warm bed, he had to bed down with the sheep. One day while the Wizard was brewing a particularly potent brew, the wizard’s apprentice snook off for a nap for only a moment or two. He woke up to hear an angry voice calling out his name. It was the voice of the wizard, saying “Boy! get me some wolf bane!” “We are out of it” the boy replied, “will Saint John’s Wort suffice?” “NO!” said the wizard “go get some, and don’t make me tell you twice!”...

Sassy

Sassy

Oh I am so small, but let my size fool you, For I have the biggest job of them all. I have tiny little wings that flutter and sing. They sing the song of your heart. My face is cute and round, And never wears a frown. I am happy and gay all the livelong day. Many see me as a child, but I have incredible depth. Oh you over there, go give her a kiss. Yes that one in the blue dress. Do you need me to help? Or can you do it yourself? OK I got what you need a small arrow with speed. With that done I off to the next. What do you need small child of woe? Oh mom is over there with a hug she does hold. Aw, look over there a lady wants romance. I’ll just shoot my dart into the husband’s heart. Oops, was that a little to hard, Oh josh, what did I start Well deal...

Little Leprechaun

Little Leprechaun

. Little green man that’s not very tall, Is so small it tends to enthrall. They say I am in an intoxicated state, This might be true. I will not debate. Let my home-brew poteen be your guide, Everyone knows it’s my joy and my pride. Luck O’ Irish, this I have with pride, Especially with crocks of gold I do hide. Pots and crocks of gold, you do pursue, Rainbows, rainbows, is my big clue, Even if you think you can find my Crock of gold, It’s mine to have and to hold. Having a trick that is special to me, All you will get is ashes, don’t you see. Understand this when next we do meet, Nothing is faster than my small tiny feet.   Poem Style – Acrostic / Poem Catagory – Funny Written by Lady...

Obsessed with World Problems

Obsessed with World Problems

It’s time to see what we all can do To solve the world a problem or two. How about we solve war Make the warmongers roar By making them play Winnie the pooh. Famine will not be so simply solved We could get the warmongers involved While their playing with pooh Make them cook some good stew Then in some time it would be dissolved What can we do about terrorism? We know it’s a form of barbarism So get a Pygmy tribe And make them circ u mscribe Until there is no terror in him. OK a simple solution to drought And something that will not make you pout Drill a hole through the earth To a great ocean of worth But please don’t try to drown the Boy Scout. After the hole in the earth was dug Global warming might not be so smug Would have to wait and see...

Ye Old Sweat Shops

Ye Old Sweat Shops

Ever been at a place where it is like Ye Old Sweat Shops You know the type, where production is fast and pace never stops It is always hurry, faster and just get it done, but if you do hurry You can make mistakes, as it is impossible to see everything when in a scurry In Ye Old Sweat Shop at times a person can’t finish a task Next thing they know there are ten more things shoved in its place Ye Old Sweat Shops make everyone feel like they are always in a race Later when it is least expected the mistake is seen, and suddenly it is a crime Suddenly they are taking the heat for not taking their time Now they are branded as careless, unprofessional and who knows what else too There is no mention of the other million things they did right from the queue And the...

Man of no Surprise

Man of no Surprise

Once a upon a time there was a man of no surprise, No matter how much he tried his actions were his demise. He thinks he will be clever in getting his girl to the alter So he takes her to the wedding ring counter.   With questions and jests to the clerk of the place He tries to get her into perusing the wedding ring case When she does not respond and wonders off to look around He suddenly spots her Christmas present he had found.   With a huff and a puff, and his brain shut down He calls Dancer and Prancer to send her to town Away with you, he cries, away with you now And with a frown, to the food court she does plow.   After a time with brain still in a muddle His thoughts come back and now thinks he can cuddle So he runs to the one he wants most...